Surgical post mordem

I just finished a four day stay at the hospital to complete the fusion of my ankle. I now have a six inch rod that is bolted into fibula down through ankle. I can taste the metal. Thanks for the well wishes!

My stay was uneventful and I consumed decent hospital food as well as dilauded every two hours. All in all it wasn't a completely horrible experience.

Testicle Tuesday...Hail the Queen!

Last week I promised to post images of the quintessential scream queen. So, without futher adieau...

Jamie Lee Curtis starred in nearly a dozen horror movies. Her resume includes Halloween I & II, Prom Night, The Fog, Terror Train, Road Games, Halloween H2O, Virus, and Halloween Resurrection. Her storied career has been masturbatory fodder for over 30 years. She’s unbelievably beautiful and has inspired future generations of horror movie vixens.

Under the knife...again

Well, tomorrow at 5:30am I report to a local hospital to have hopefully the last surgery on my left foot. The doc will be inserting a rod into my ankle to stabilize it and fuse it into place. It'll take three hours and probably 4-5 days of recovery. Hopefully the dilauded will ease my pain and make the hospital stay that much more comfortable. I'll be back y'all. Later...until next week.

Testicle Tuesday...scream queens pt 2

As I divulged last week I'm an unabashed fan of horror movies. I'm an even bigger fan of the saucy little tarts that are a mainstay of the genre. Last week I brought you some lesser known vixens but this week is the creme de la creme of modern horror hotness, the holy triumverate of contemporary horror. Enjoy you sickos!


I've had an ongoing crush on Neve Campbell for ten years. Her face is timeless and her body utter perfection. She graced the screen in the Scream movies and was dead sexy to boot. On a personal note to Ms. Campbell...Will you marry me?



Our next scream queen is Jennifer Love Hewitt. She spiced up the silver screen in I Know What You Did Last Summer, and the sequal, I Still Know... She's still a tasty morsel, huh.


Naomi Watts burst into our collective consciousness in The Ring and The Ring II, not to mention King Kong and a number of other movies. Ms. Watts is one of the hottest and most talented actresses on the planet...and she's all ours, for a week.



Next week the quintessential scream queen who started it all...

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!

Man I could use a drink because of a shit day (don't ask)! So, since I love lists and alcohol I bring you the best mixed drinks ever (values given are either ounces or shots)…

1. Long Island Iced Tea-mix vodka, rum, tequila, gin, triple sec, and a shot of cola. After six or eight of these you’ll forget your troubles…and likely your own name.
2. Grey goose vodka or Finlandia (2 at least), orange juice, and a shot of gin…mmmmmmm, tasty
3. Manhattan-1 ½ blended whiskey and ¾ sweet vermouth…very tasty and potent
4. Cape Cod-a generous portion of vodka with cranberry juice (primarily for coloring), and a splash of orange juice.
5. Corkscrew-1 ½ light rum, ½ dry vermouth, ½ peach brandy.
6. Kamikaze-vodka, triple sec, lime juice…use a lot of vodka
7. Tequila Sunrise-2 tequila, 1 grenadine, orange juice…yummy.
8. Orgasm-mix equal parts of vodka, amaretto, kahlua, and Baily’s Irish Cream.
9. Captain Morgan Spiced Rum and Coke…this was my plasma in college and law school.
10. Hot Toddy-use whiskey, rum, and/or kahlua, add boiling water and sugar…great for winter nights and a day on the ski slopes.

Bwahahahahaha

So, looks like the eastern parts are getting pounded by a blizzard, canceling over 2,000 flights nation wide. Bwahahahaha, it's gonna be 70 here in Denver suckas! I think I might go have a big juicy steak for lunch, then go to the park or tool around my neighborhood looking for garage sales. Later you frozen nor-eastern beeeyatches!

Testicle Tuesday...scream queens

Anyone who's known me for more than five minutes knows about my horror movie obsession. I love the genre. So here are a few contemporary yet undiscovered scream queens from a few decent horror flicks.

Eliza Dushku has been in several films, most notably my favorite horror film of 2003, Wrong Turn. Damn if she ain't sexy!


Maggie Grace was a part of the Lost cast before summarily getting killed off. But she looked ever so yummy in the 2005 remake of the classic The Fog.


Gine Phillips brought some much needed sexuality to what was otherwise an ultimately forgetable Jeepers Creepers.


Next week, the holy triumverate of modern scream queens...